There was not a moment, as the hours passed and I waited for the television debut of Sin by Silence, that I was not aware of the fact I was in my new home, with my family and friends waiting for the movie to start. As I ran around the kitchen preparing the last few items of dinner, I could not help but realize how overwhelmed I was feeling. I was experiencing a mix of emotions, I was both excited about the movie just about to begin. Yet, I was sad knowing that all my sisters from Convicted Women Against Abuse would not be able to see it, and that truly hurt my heart. I almost felt guilty about being free and having the chance to watch the world television premiere of all of our stories.
As the movie began, many of my neighbors who had never seen the movie before were speechless. As tears rolled down my face I realized that three years ago on 10/17/2008 I was in court and the Judge had the courage to release me. I actually began to sob, almost uncontrollably as the feeling swept over me. As I turned and watched my family and neighbors watching the movie, I could see for many of them, it brought up issues from childhood between their parents, or in a previous marriage. I knew there was a reason I was freed and that I was able to be a part of such a life changing movie.
Tears continued rolling down my cheeks for the remainder of the movie. It was almost like I was really seeing the movie for the first time and I was utterly and completely overwhelmed. I am just hoping that other victims of abuse who are trapped in a current relationship at the moment they were watching the movie - that they heard us all loud and clear, that it hopefully gave them the strength and courage it takes to speak to someone they trust and to get help to make a safety plan for themselves.
After the movie was over and I waited as our house guests left, I looked at my family and the feeling of utmost gratefulness consumed me. I have been given a chance to truly make a difference in the world and I want to cherish every second of that opportunity. I am eternally thankful to Olivia Klaus, the Director/Producer of the film, and her Co-Producer Ann Caryn-Cleveland for having the strength and courage to share our voices with the world and work to break the silence and shame left behind due to abuse.
I want to thank each and everyone of you who tuned in. Wherever you were, don’t let it be just another movie. We matter! Share it with your friends and family, co-workers and everyone you know that you want to be part of breaking the silence and make a difference. I also want to thank Investigation Discovery for making the decision to air Sin By Silence seeing the movie as being so much more, and realizing it is a life changing documentation of victims of abuse who experienced the worst of the worst and are survivors today. If you are a victim of abuse now, reach out, YOU MATTER!!